Been a while since I've written

Damn .
I am a bad blogger . LOL

I see it was almost one year ago I wrote.
A hell of a lot has happened since then.

I met 2 losers on an on-line dating site. The first one was a thief and the second one was a married thief. No more of that bullshit for me. I wasted 7 months of my life with the second one. I never thought he was married. WRONG.
So I blocked him from my phone and my life.

Harley didn't graduate from high school. That's ok. He will be returning and doing better. I feel like a failure though. I feel like I failed as a parent and failed Denny.

All of those feelings and what Scott( loser 2) put me thru and refusing to grieve for D had me go through a little mental breakdown. I spent a week in the hospital and 3 months in intensive counselling. I was diagnosed with depression( DUH) post traumatic stress disorder- due to the way D died and other factors, and anxiety.

Since then I have moved ahead ---notice I didn't say move on ---I'm moving forward with my life.

My best friend and sister from a different mother has set me up with her husbands brother. Let me tell you something, this man is the sweetest man I have met. We talk, laugh and just enjoy each other.

In 9 days (7/2/10) he will be here in Ohio for one week , his vacation but he is also coming to spend it with me. We will really get to know each other better during that time. He makes me feel really good. Makes me feel special. Makes me feel desired. I like that, really like that.

Sami and Shortround are getting married in October. We found a gorgeous dress at the Goodwill. Thanks D for introducing me to that store ions ago, I can't get enough of thrifting.

I started back to school. YES...me in school. I know right ?! LOL
I'm doing good right now I have a B average. Mostly for bullshit...life experience bullshit. I need a degree for that? LOL I will have something to fall back on.

I will be starting with a new company, same job and same juvie jail, in July. Should be interesting to say the least.


I have started purging things I was holding on to . I got rid of the sofa he died on. It wasn't healthy for me to keep it. I know that now. I know he would want me to move ahead with my life and not sit in a funk as I have been or make the rotten descions I made with the men I chose. I know he would like Ken. I do. I really do like him bunches.
I think this one is gonna work. He will be the last man I ever give my heart, soul and self too.

Can't think of anything else to ramble on about right now.

I promise oh lonely blog of mine I will return more often and update you on my life.

All my love to you all~jax